Love Lost, Love Gained

Since my sister past away, my life has change is so many ways. I feel that her passing has caused me to feel the way a man feels when he is sitting in the doctors office, at age 40, and finds out that he will be dying soon. This might sound a little funny but I have found that I have really embraced life and reevaluated what really matters most to me. It has been a long journey to say the least, in trying to determine what truly is important to me. I have learned that my family is a very important element in my life. In all honesty before my sister had passed away I truly felt as if she was the only one that could really be there for me, and the only one who cared enough to help me through every element in my life, even if that means sacrificing to help me out. Our sisterly love was something I have become more and more thankful and appreciative for. She has done so much for me and has given so much for my happiness. After she passed away I learned how to truly love people and especially my family. I mean I have always loved others and especially my family, they are my family after all. But by truly loving, I believe that means cherishing them and believing that they loved me back. (That is a terrible description but this is the best I can do). I began to see my family in a different light. My love for my family has grown exponentially! For onces I am just excited beyond all excitement to see my family when I come home from college. My excitement is to the amount where I think I might just burst from happiness. So even thought I have lost one person that meant the most to me, I have gained many relationships that I never thought to be where it is today. I want to explain that I am not implying that I hated my family, nor am I implying that they didn't care about me, on the contrary. I know that they have always loved me, but for some reason I just didn't see it the right way. And my sister passing away has helped me to open my eyes. And I will also admit I am sure my parents hearts have changed as well. This isn't a one way change at all. I truly do miss my sister but I know that God has plan. I know that part of God's plan is for her passing, as hard as it has been. I know that I will see her again and when I do get to see her, I think I will cry for dies on end. It will be the most joyous reuniting. I think if I am this excited to see my sister again, I can't image the feelings I will feel when I see my loving Savior again! I look forward to seeing them both! I might just cause a flood in heaven, or hopefully there will be a good draining system there. :)